Be Gentle

 

On Page 61 of his book, The Passionate State of Mind, Eric Hoffer writes two entries which I shall quote and then comment on.

 

Hoffer: “          101

 

It is an evil thing to expect too much either of ourselves or others”

 

My response: I agree with this but wish to qualify Hoffer’s remark; it is an evil thing to expect too much from us or others, especially expecting perfection all the time, or the first time out from a child, from others or from ourselves. The ethical law of moderation, coupled with a desire to be merciful, forgiving, and reasonable, does suggest that we set small, achievable goals that incrementally build self-confidence in us, motivating us to go a couple of steps farther, mastering that level and then going higher and higher, farther, and farther. All people have different levels of talent, and they learn at different speeds and in different ways.

 

Children should be taught that they are almost limitlessly gifted, talented, and self-realizing is to keep self-perfecting for a lifetime at what interests one, and no one else gets to pick that goal or goals for one.

 

Also, once children are taught to self-realize, then it is not so painful to expect more of them or of ourselves.

 

Hoffer: “Disappointment in ourselves does not moderate our expectations of others; on the contrary, it raises them. It is as if we wish to be disappointed with our fellow men.

 

One does not really love mankind when one expects too much of them.”

 

My response: We should not worry too much about being disappointed with others by expecting too much of them, complaining that they are not living up to our ideals, our expectations of them.

 

Each individual, of his own free will, and by his own effort, must save himself and insist that he self-realize.

 

Our purpose is to quit straightening out our neighbor, and to straighten out ourselves. We cannot settle for being disappointed with our performance yesterday: we must get up each day and try, try again and then we should start improving.

 

We must invite others to join us as maverizers, but we must not expect too much of them, even if they are our children.

 

Hoffer: “          102

 

The craving to change the world is perhaps a reflection of the craving to change ourselves. The untenability of the situation does not by itself always give rise to a desire for change. Our quarrel with the world is an echo of the endless quarrel proceeding within us. The revolutionary agitator must first start a war in every soul before he can find recruits for his war with the world.”

 

My response: We need to change ourselves, not others, the country, or the world. When collectivists and intellectuals quarrel with themselves, they are not self-referential as they should be identifying the problem and solution as personal and internal, rather they nurse a grudge against the world, and strive mightily to tear down all that is.

 

As individuating supercitizens we must always be on guard against demagogues and gurus seeking to start a war in our souls so we become first discontented and then frustrated, so we must flee into his mass movement, and push his holy cause against the world.